poker

this past night, like so many nights of this school year, i spent several hours playing poker with some friends. for whatever reason (but certainly not because i'm good) i've been winning money the last few times. the thing is, i don't like winning. it's not that i don't like getting money, it's just that i don't particularly like taking money from my friends. while playing, i've found myself purposefully making bad decisions. i'll allow my friends to stay in to play rather than push them out or i'll call a bet just to play with them. it's only fifty cents once in a while, but hardly the mark of a good poker player. on the other hand, losing money in poker isn't really fun either. i guess i just don't have the killer instincts to play poker. or maybe i do, and simply choose to ignore them.